Pati, Patni aur Woh

Oh Gejoos. Just when you thought it was safe to turn on your TV again… While everyone was speculating about Rakhi ka Swayamwar II and what appeared to be a sequel set up ending to Rakhi ka Swayamwar I, the sneaky folks at NDTV Imagine had this tucked up their sleeves all along!

PR note: “Mumbai, August 10, 2009:  They’re young, rich, famous and in love. And now they are ready to take their relationship to the next level.  But will they survive the experience?  After the spectacular success of Rakhi ka Swayamvar, NDTV Imagine presents Pati, Patni Aur Woh, a groundbreaking show that puts the ‘real’ back into ‘reality’ programming.  This new show will remove 5 unique celebrity couples from their glamorous lives and thrust them into the ‘real’ world where they will become parents!”

I like how they phrased that. My guess is this show will also remove any chance these 5 unique celebrities had of making it in the real world as actors as well. But then, why prolong the torture right? We already have a jungle full of wannabes on Sony.

Apparently “Pati, Patni Aur Woh” is an adaptation of the hit international format by Love Productions called “Baby Borrowers” and will be produced by BBC Worldwide Productions India.

PR Note: “Taking on the parenting challenge are India’s most loved television stars and real life couples.

1. Television’s Ram and Sita – Debina Bonnerjee & Gurmeet Chaudhary
2. Happily married for many years, the glamorous couple Shilpa Saklani & Apurva Agnihotri
3. Recently engaged and India’s most talked about couple – Rakhi Sawant & Elesh Parujanwala
4. On screen favorites and off screen newly-weds Juhi Parmar & Sachin Shroff
5. The scorching couple whose relationship is much talked about – Mouni Roy & Gaurav Chopra

(Er.. nobody panic if you don’t know who any of these people are, that’s probably why they’re on this show! But who am I kidding. I know I’ll watch.) Damn you reality TV, you’re worse than nicotine.

PR Note: “Pati, Patni Aur Woh allows these couples to go through the challenging, frustrating but rewarding experience of parenthood – from infancy to adolescence.”

Adolescence? Exactly how long is this show?

PR Note: “The couples will spend an entire month in a closed environment, monitored by cameras 24X7 which will capture their journey as they embark on a new life of discovery as first time parents. Their journey will be divided into five stages:

Pregnancy: The women will be made to wear empathy bellies similar to that of a woman who is 8 months pregnant and will have to attend pre-natal classes.
Infants: A new born baby will be handed over to the couples and they will have to take care of it’s every need, including feeding, changing nappies and erratic sleep schedules.
Toddlers: They come in next, with their own set of demands and tantrums
Pre-teen and Teenagers: These are the rebellious years when parents need to learn how to discipline children, without alienating them.
The Elderly: Life comes a full circle with the arrival of the elderly and the couples will need to show maturity and understanding in dealing with them.

The children taking part in the show are real life infants, toddlers, pre-teens and teenagers. Their parents will be behind the scenes 24×7, monitoring their child and the couple, through the cameras, in close proximity.”

There’s just so much to say here, I don’t quite know where to begin!

First up WHO are these people who are willing to give their children over to random celebrities to experiment with for a month? (Child services are you listening?) Even if I were to get on board with the whole baby thing, do they REALLY have to take  two generation leaps into the future? Or is this just a tactic to keep Baa* in the picture? (*You know the wise old TV matriarch who’s lived through several leaps and is now around 189 years old.) I’m also glad the specified that they’re using “real infants, toddlers, pre-teens and teenagers” I don’t think I could handle another desi version of  Small Wonder.

PR Note: “Throughout the series the couples will continue to live their everyday lives – just like the rest of us. They will have to fulfill the many social and professional obligations that come with parenthood – from entertaining relatives, in- laws and guests to performing ceremonies and taking part in other activities like parties and picnics and of course ensuring that the kids finish their homework, and all this without any help from nannies, house help or their parents and operate within a limited middle class budget.”

No maids? Middle class budget? Oh boohoo. Suck it up that’s real life!

PR Note: “Announcing the launch of this unique show, Shailja Kejriwal – EVP Content, NDTV Imagine said, “This is as real as it gets!  With Pati, Patni Aur Woh, audiences will see these famous couples in real life situations and be part of their first journey into parenthood; sharing their joys, sorrows, trials and achievements.  We believe that the show will not only resonate with all audiences and will also be a great fun experience for the younger generation, who plan to start their own families in the future.  Patni, Patni Aur Woh promises to be an emotional rollercoaster through many unique situations, each handled differently by the various couples! Adds Saul Nassé, General Manager and Creative Head of BBC Worldwide Productions India,  “Baby Borrowers is a unique and highly entertaining format with a social experiment at its heart. It is undoubtedly one of the most interesting reality formats on the market and makes for compelling viewing packed with tears and tantrums, as much from the couples as the terrible twos! Baby Borrowers is another example of the success of British programming, and in particular British formats. I am sure it will translate well to the Indian market with Pati, Patni Aur Woh’s exciting mix of celebrity glamour and real life drama.”

Are you thinking what I’m thinking?
Guess who’s not going back to Canada anytime soon!

Psst! I’m willing to bet that iPill jumps on as a show sponsor any minute now (in case you hadn’t noticed they’ve been going nuts advertising, this might just be the clincher!)  🙂