Durjoy Datta: How to Stop Obsessing Over Your Boyfriend!

Durjoy Datta , 03 Apr 2012
Durjoy Datta
Durjoy Datta

Girls, how many times does it happen, that you find yourself in depression and blame your boyfriend for it? If the number is a 2-digit one, it’s time you woke up and realize that it’s actually you who is pushing yourself into depression for no reason. If you feel like “the more I try to make it better, the worse it gets,” here’s what you’re doing wrong:

(1) YOU’RE SMOTHERING HIM
Make him an important part of your life, yes, but don’t make him your life. There is no bigger turn off for a guy, than a clingy girlfriend.

(2) YOU’RE TOO PARANOID
If he doesn’t talk to you for a whole day, it doesn’t mean that he has forgotten all about you. It also doesn’t mean that he was run over by a truck. Let him work in peace.

(3) WHY SO SILENT?
If you give him the silent treatment, chance are—instead of missing you terribly, like you intended—he might not even notice anything wrong! If he did something bad, TELL HIM. Silence doesn’t work.

(4) YOU’RE EXPECTING TOO MUCH
If you hate when he replies to your super-long, super-emotional mails with a monosyllable, STOP SENDING HIM THOSE. He is a guy. He finds it uncool to be so madly in love with someone.

(5) YOU’RE DERPIVING HIM OF “FUN”
If he spares a few seconds at that hot chick that just entered the club, it does not mean that he doesn’t find you attractive anymore. It’s just a reflex. To him, you’ll always be the prettiest. So, chill out.

(6) YOU’RE BEING STUPID
Expecting him to remember what you wore on your first date is downright unfair to him. He won’t remember. Neither will he notice your nail colour.

(7) YOU’RE NOT RESPECTING HIS BRO-CODE
If he has fifteen guy friends, it might be that each of them is more important to him than you. Bitter truth. Live with it. You don’t own every free second of his life. Let him hang out with his guy friends.

(8) YOU’RE IMPOSING ON HIS GAME TIME
It is very hard to accept, but you will never, ever, ever be a priority over his PlayStation. Dancing nude in front of him when he’s in the middle of God of War will stir nothing other than sheer irritation.

All said and done, it’s true that girls want their guys to be crazy about them. But today, there is a difference between love and relationship. The guy who truly loves you will not feel smothered when you pay too much attention to him, he’ll not be irritated if you call him in work-time—he’ll feel wanted, your silent treatments would kill him, your long mails would be cherished, he’ll lose all appetite to look at other girls, he’ll remember the exact shade of green you wore on your first date, you’ll be a priority to him over every other friend.

Who am I kidding? 99 per cent guys are not like that. And that’s because they are . . . well—guys! Accept that and cherish your relationship, just like the way it is.

P.S. Love or relationship, PlayStation is still more important.

Durjoy Datta is the author of six bestsellers and has sold over a million copies over the last four years. When he is not doing that, he struggles to make a living as an entrepreneur and is the co-founder of Grapevine India Publishers.
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