Durjoy Datta
Durjoy Datta

So I asked best-selling author Durjoy Datta (who’s been busy romancing Hong Kong) who are the five “boys” he thinks every girl will probably come across (and potentially date) in her life before she finds her man. Here is his list! I thought it was hilarious and somewhat true, make sure you leave me a comment and let me know which of these BOYS you’ve come across in your relationship travels. And gentlemen, man up and admit which one of these YOU used to be ;P

The Gym Buff

You will start dating him because he looks good in shirts, maybe reminds you of an actor you always liked. But then he will bring out his tight t-shirts, the protein shakes, the pair of jeans that pushes his crotch right to this throat, and the subway sandwiches (without the sauces). He will start making you feel bad about the cupcakes you routinely eat. It won’t take you long to realize that there’s only so much time you can spend looking at abs, and that you can’t keeping feeling as the fat pig in the relationship.

The Obsessive Guy

He was great at first. Charming and possessive. He showered you with all the attention you ever needed. Treated you like a princess. The both of you made a world around yourselves. Life was great till you realized you had no friends, no life any more. And the guy turns around and says with a Dexter-type smile, ‘Why do you need anyone else when I’m here? Then slowly you lose your call details, your Facebook passwords and your life to him. It takes you a year to break up with him and finally stop getting crying/threatening calls from him!

The Rich Guy

Your first date will be at an expensive, dim lit restaurant. There will be people in flowing dresses around. Going Dutch? You must be crazy. You will be embarrassed taking out your tattered purse in front of him. The drive back home was in a glimmery Range Rover, one of his many cars. It will all go along fine till the time your realize that money can buy things, a lot of things, but not a conversation. Not yet. And you might just end up cheating on him.

The Engineer

Finally. Finally. Here’s a guy you can talk to. The guy who will listen to you. The guy who doesn’t talk just about himself. The self-deprecating, funny guy! The guy who you could take back home to your mom to. But then you will enter his flat and find five guys and three hundred beer bottles and about a million cigarette stubs sharing the apartment with him. You will discover his obsession with Prison Break and Pink Floyd. His cupboard will puke at you and you will never sleep over at his place. Unless you don’t mind sharing the bed with three of his roommates.

The Symbiosis Guy

You think you are getting old. You think you are getting boring. You spend your weekends at home watching television. Then comes along this guy in his knee length shorts, his fake Abercrombie & Fitch t-shirt, a cigarette dangling from his limp fingers, and not a single F&$# to give. He takes you on a joy ride of parties, open bars, bad trip and good trips, and asks you to screw everything else! Life is great again. Until one day, you just lock yourself up on a Saturday, tired, and said, enough, I’m old now and I need a MAN, not a BOY!

Psst! Read all of our Durjoy Datta posts here!