Today I am THRILLED to present to you a delicious play on food (in one act and several cocktails!) Meet Bombay Bhukkad, my FAVOURITE foodstagrammer (and piece-of-my-heart in general) as he kicks off his ekdum hatke CHOMPing reviews on MissMalini.com, enzwai! Love, MM xoxo
A white sedan pulls up at a traffic signal, there is some music leaking from the windows. An exasperated look on the driver’s face (Bombay Bhukkad/Me) you can tell I am getting late. There are three others in the car, the co-driver (a Lawyer) mulls over Whatsapp, the lovers in the backseat (Chashmish & Richa) are crooning Maroon 5. The signal turns green.
Chashmish: What kind of food is it bro?
Richa: *This love is taking it’s toll on me, she said goodbye…*
Chashmish: BRO WHAT KIND OF FOOD IS IT?!
BB: Bar food dost, and a LOT of cocktails. A LOT!
The lawyer who has been busy all this while trying to crack a huge case with the help of Whatsapp emoticons gives me a deathly stare. I can read her mind, she always thinks that loud. Must be because of my love for cocktails, or the traffic or my shirt, or me… The thought breaks soon.
Chashmish: I don’t drink.
BB: I saw you drunk last week.
Chashmish: Birthday bro!
BB: Oh shit, Belated Happy Birthday!
Chashmish: …Wasn’t mine.
(Umm, did she just say… LOL)
Richa: Bubu, have one drink na!
Chasmish: No no, I made a promise to myself.
Lawyer: What do you mean, why?!
Richa: LOL, BB why do you always piss her off?!
A big WTF lights up in my head but we have reached our destination, the valet is readily available, it’s pouring. Rains + Food Review, man I am a lucky b*astard. Almost.
Lawyer: Where is my umbrella?
BB: It’s just two steps, hop skip &…
Lawyer: You took it this morning, where is it?
BB: Uhh… I…
Richa: That’s three steps…
Richa: Hop Skip & Jump.
Lawyer: Where is my…
He is holding an umbrella for her, must remember to add this chap to my will.
We enter “Brickhouse Cafe & Bar”. It’s at the other corner of Lokhandwala Market towards the backroad. The first impression is good, it’s empty (I like that) also because we are there early (8 PM) The look is nice, earthy, a lot of wood and many servers. A pleasant chap comes up.
Pleasant Chap: Yes sir!
BB: I am here for a review.
Pleasant Chap: Review… sir. Yes sir… anywhere.
He basically tells us we can pick any table we like with a swift theatrical wave of his hand; reminds me of “jahan tak nazar jati hain wahan tak zameen hamari hain!”
So we sit down, I am wondering if the house lights are going to be enough to take the pictures I need for Instagram and for this review on MissMalini.com.
Our server gets us the menu, there is a range of drinks in there, some molecular…
My first reaction is towards the names of these cocktails, I detest it when bars have perverted slutty names for drinks (I still remember “Blowjob” on someones menu) luckily none of that is in play at Brickhouse. We are ready to order our drinks!
Richa: Dutch Kettle! (Gin/Lychee based…)
Lawyer: I will have the Candy Floss cocktail. (Rum based)
BB: Bacchi hain kya
Actions the lawyer for a high five, which meets a stare, quietly puts his hand down.
BB: I will have an Old Fashioned.
Richa: LOL. Like your haircut.
Promptly Richa and the Lawyer slap hands to give the most thunderous high five of 2014; only to be overpowered by a loud slurp, it’s Chashmish and he is already halfway through his drink. He can feel our stare.
Chashmish: WHAT! It’s called the Smoked Godfather, have some respect!
Clearly a fan of the movie Godfather Chashmish unabashaedly lugged the bar towards him. The chaps at Brickhouse give us Pirates Poison, a cucumber based drink which we know is an instant hit as Richa kicks her shoes off to feel at home. The BHC Rum drum is massive we can’t finish it, post a couple of Old Fahshioned/Pirates Poison I switch to Jack & Coke, stuffing our mouths with food never stops. The lawyer can hold her drink and her stare longer than any of us can expect, I choose to look the other way… at the ceiling. “Bhagwaan bachaley, kya bhool raha hu mein”! Chashmish by now has had his fill of delicious cocktails and has fallen in love, with everything.
Chashmish: I love… yuh.
BB: Umm, thanks.
Chashmish: Wadda jwab yuh hyave.
BB: Thanks actually I am a…
Chashmish: (Sippppp) I luhv cookumburr, wadddddaaaa cookumbur.
Voraciously chugging on a Pirates Poison.
BB: You wan’t another…
Chashmish: Gharrr chaloooo partaayyy kartein hain! KARAOOOOOKEEEEE!
We hug that evening, every ten minutes, only when the main course made its way did the bromance take a break. I had heard about their burgers from fellow instagram blogger @mumbaifoodie.
Closing Note: It was an evening well spent, the bar was packed by the time we got done. It poured through the last hour, the lawyer came to terms with the fact that not being able to recognise a new haircut is not a punishable offence under any section, in any court of law. We Karaooooooooked that night.
A little slickness to customer service, a better music selection will make this place a sure hit. I hear it goes packed most evenings. You might be reminded of Three Wise Men (check out MissMalini’s TWM visit) when you walk in here, those guys have a hit formula going with their Karaokes, maybe we will see some live/inclusive music at BHC too in the near future. I for one will be back for some Pirates Poison, Calamari & the Epic Beef Burger! Go experience.
About the reviewer: Bombay Bhukkad is a greedy glutton with an amusingly transparent view about food, he is no food connoisseur but understands tasty from otherwise. A guest blogger for MissMalini.com you can see him CHOMP his way through it all on instagram.com/bombaybhukkad. Want to get a restaurant reviewed? Write in to [email protected]