Albert Camus once wrote that that only serious question in life is whether or not to kill yourself. Tom Robbins wrote the only serious question in life is whether time has a beginning and end… But there is only one serious question in life. And that is: who knows how to make love stay? Answer me that and I’ll tell you whether or not to kill yourself. – Still Life With Woodpecker (my favourite book!)
Oh man, how I have cried today. But nobody panic! I’m just one of those nut jobs who actually LOVES it when words on a page, or pictures on a screen, bring (bitter-sweet) tears to my eyes and put an achy lump in my throat…!
This evening I saw Katti Batti, a movie I have really been looking forward to watching (hence the risk of disappointment could have been high!) But I’m a huge Kangana Ranaut fangirl and have always had a soft spot for my Pirate Radio boy Imran Khan (remind me to tell you how to make watching the movie Kidnap into a super amazing drinking game later! #MausamIsAwesome) PLUS, Nikhil Advani is boss. (I even danced to a Patiala House song at my wedding!) so I knew I’d be well safe of a Houseful 2 situation! Yup, this film would have a certain finesse… In fact, it even has origami.
BUT, was I expecting to relate so much to a “commercial-ish” Bollywood love story and get the answer to the age old question that has tormented me for nearly a decade?! No, that I did not expect. What’s the question you ask? Well obviously – Who Knows How To Make Love Stay? More on that (my favourite topic, EVER in life) in a blog of a different color, but for now I give you all the reasons you must go watch this movie today! Oh and… take someone you love. Hold their hand and kiss them later. In fact, kiss them sooner than later.
PS. Please pack tissues – you’re in for An Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind meets The Fault In Our Stars kinda emotional rollercoaster ride. (FYI sniffle queen Natasha Patel, don’t say I did not give you fair warning!) So let us begin, shall we? xoxo
1. The Lip To Lip Stop Motion Video!
I’ve seen this done before, but somehow it never gets old! It’s cute, it’s quirky and it takes approximately 10 photos for every second of film. #Respect (Oh btw Imran & Avantika, you now totally have to do this with Imara! #Bubbles)
2. Imran Looks F*cking Hot.
Aaaand he’s BACK! DUDE. Think Jai from Jaane Tu… Ya Jaane Na all “grown up” (what up Swingers reference!), more mature, more complex, more deliciously dorky… :P but with an extra splash of sexy! Just the kind of guy you hope will one day chase you to the airport before your flight takes off to profess his once-in-a-lifetime kinda love! There’s an amazing motorcycle scene that captures his nerd-hot vibe brilliantly. LOL. (Oh PS. Apparently no one under says LOL anymore so I’m switching to hahaha #kthanksbye.)
Also, I blame you Harvard, but that’s exactly the kind of “boyfriend sweatshirt” your girlfriend wants to borrow to sleep in when you’re not in town. Because it feels like you.
3. Forget Queen, Kangana Is King.
I mean, just look at the girl’s track record? Also, she’s such a badass in this movie! Every girl wants to be this exact same girl in life/in love. She nails the character so beautifully (and what looks like) effortlessly again and as I watch her in movie after movie I wonder… could anyone else play the roles she’s doing or are they all just crafted “quintessentially Kangana” from the start? I think it has something to do with how she talks and emotes… with her skin. (Oh, and I’m loving the bangs!) Did you catch my #21TwitterQs with her for you btw?
4. The First 15 minutes.
Filmed Blair-witch Project style by the actors themselves it’s exactly what real love feels like. Fast, furious, funny, random, sometimes even a little warm & fuzzy… I wanted to move in with them in. (Not in a creepy way, but just to be a fly-on-the-wall of their relationship.) I’m told they did 3 rehearsals and then the whole thing in one take. As a YouTube vlogger, I give you #MadRespect :)
5. Hot Damn Vivan Bhatena!
Vivan Bhatena makes an awesome badass. I’m so glad we’re done making all the “bad guys” look and act like Bigg Boss contestants (sorry Bigg Boss, I couldn’t resist!). This was refreshing. Also great eye-candy. Superb. (Also I went to his Instagram to find you a sexy photo and decided what’s sexier than a man and his dog, taking a nap on the floor?)
6. Devdas Clincher/Frustrated Lovers Association
Devdas is very lucky ki usse tum jaisi paro milli.
So here’s where everything I wanted to know/understand about love kicked in, but I’m trying to save that for another blog! Epic comment in the film about how come DDLJ got made ONCE and Devdas remade like FIVE times?! Think about why THAT is and stay tuned for my revelation shortly… cute little Devdas in 2015 sketch in the film I think you’ll enjoy. Even you, mummy ji.
I also predict several applications will be made to the Frustrated One-sided Lovers Association shortly. #FOSLA
7. Turtle Love.
I’m wondering if there’s some “slow and steady wins the (love) race” inception happening here or the puppies were getting out of budget? Either way sure beats Tuffy the wonder dog and those damn pigeons as a symbol of eternal love for a change! I’ll take it. (IF I had a turtle, I’d name him Sheldon. Get it?)
8. Everybody’s Wardrobes!
I’m gonna get my fashion team to decode all the looks in the film for you and how to get them! *ahem* Anushka my Pocket, over to you!
9. “Tujhe meri tarhan koi nahin pyar karega, kar hi nahi sakta.”
Nobody will ever love you like I do. Still true. In any language. *sigh* also, all happy couples may seem alike, but the drama is… same same but different :)
10. Kangana In a Bob.
Still smoking! Apparently it’s still the year of the bob guys! So this song is aptly titled Sarfira aka head case? :) Also this music video reminds me of a bunch of International music videos. Especially the part where they’re singing to the camera, close-up at right angles to each other. Anyone know which one?
11. Can I Get Me Those Abs?
One of the girls in Kangana’s college “entourage” shows off some sick abs. I need those in my life. Please share your secret and spread the love, lady! (This girl, in the back. Text me please!)
Imran Khan and Kangana Ranaut have some epic on screen chemistry. It’s subtle and sexy, just the way it should be. You can tell they didn’t over play it, but the nuance is just right. From the tingles you feel when your hand accidentally brushes against new love or how much you long to watch them sleep… (One of the many reasons, why I love, LOVE!) Captain Advani has captured it all, coupled with a series of slickly textured flashbacks. Well played.
13. Relationship Drama 99%, Phone Battery 1%
Don’t you f*cking hate that? Please, iPhone, invent a better situation, people are dying over here.
So what’s so different about this movie? If I tell you too much more, I’ll have to kill you… (*high fiving myself* at the irony) But I’ll tell you this: Katti Batti tries bravely to take you beyond the happily ever after without promising you another happily ever after. And that’s not easy to do because that’s not easy to take… but welcome to the real world people! Wanna listen to one of my favourite songs now?
Sometimes we fall down and can’t get back up
We’re hiding behind skin that’s too tough
How come we don’t say I love you enough
‘Til it’s too late, it’s not too late
We only got 86 400 seconds in a day
To turn it all around or to throw it all away
Gotta tell ’em that we love ’em while we got the chance to say,
Gotta live like we’re dying oh
Well if your plane fell out of the skies
Who would you call with your last goodbye
Should be so careful who we left out of our lives
So when we long for absolution, there’ll be no one on the line
So I ask you again, who knows how to make love stay? Stay tuned for my conversations with Imran & Kangana on this very topic! Now go hug somebody and take them to watch the film!
Katti Batti in theatres September 18th, that’s TODAY!