Believe it or not, Uday Chopra‘s Twitter profile is actually a lot of fun to scroll through. He’s got some surprisingly deep words of wisdom in there, but more than that, reading his outrageously bad jokes is actually a form of guilty pleasure. Especially on days when your brain has already left the building and no form of productivity is going to happen. So, since it’s the 30th of December and we know you’re really not working, here are some so-bad-it’s-good Uday Chopra jokes to entertain you:
This pick up line…
My new pick up line – “I would really like to give you 23 of my chromosomes”
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) December 22, 2015
This very relevant one…
If tomorrow night is New Years Eve, then tonight should be New Years Adam. Cause Adam came before Eve. #DontLieIKnowYouLaughed
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) December 30, 2015
This mad one…
If I have a child,Ill name him/her Madness.Then I’ll make sure he/she becomes a professional runner;so I can say,“Madness runs in my family”
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) December 24, 2015
This one we’re still scratching our head (ears?) over…
The thing with ears, is that when you touch them, they’re there!
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) August 8, 2015
This one about gobi…
Sometimes I lie in my bed and think deeply about ghobi. I was mean to ghobi when I was young, yet it forgave me. It taught me how to let go.
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) October 13, 2015
This ex-cellent one…
An ex-boxer and an Xboxer are two entirely different things.
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) November 7, 2015
This one about Shahid Kapoor…
Q: Why couldn’t anyone find @shahidkapoor ? A: Cause he was so good at being a Haider #JustHadTo
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) December 12, 2015
This one about his magical powers…
Just discovered I have magical powers; I can turn bread into toast. It’s not a great power per se and I still need a toaster to do it, but…
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) December 15, 2015
This surprising one…
A knee that was surprised and said “Gee” every time it hit an ass. Would be a Gee! Knee Ass #Genius Yes I know, the door is that way…
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) April 4, 2015
This one that he admits is bad…
Who wants to hear a really bad joke? What did one Gecko say to another when they wanted to get out of there… pic.twitter.com/n2r4i85cRE
— Uday Chopra (@udaychopra) June 16, 2015
Which one did you lol the most at?