What The Team MissMalini Girls Love & Hate About Being Women!

MissMalini , 08 Mar 2017

Yay, it’s Women’s Day! And while I know that “every day is supposed to be Women’s Day” I think its kinda nice that we take a moment to give all the ladies (single or not, Beyonce) a big *woop woop* today! So I decided to write a blog about it too. I don’t know if you know this, but Team MissMalini has pretty much from the start, consisted 90% of women. This wasn’t a conscious decision (I don’t hate boys! I married one see?) but I am really proud of the fact that so many bright young girls have found their futures here. I also LOVE the fact that all my girls are #GirlLove positive. There is no Mean Girls vibe at the MM HQ and contrary to popular belief, you DO NOT have to wear high heels to work everyday LOL.
*She said as she typed in her office PJs and flip flops. Oh yeah, I have office PJs. The PJs I exclusively wear to the office!*

Team MissMalini
Team MissMalini

So here’s what I did; I asked the girls on my team to answer two questions and then stalked them on Instagram to find you a picture that I believe best represents their personalities – so you can also see the pretty faces behind the blog! I’d love to hear your answers to the question too, so please leave one in the comments below along with your Instagram handle and I’ll follow you, I promise! xoxo

Question: What has been the hardest part of being a woman/girl in your life? And what has been your favourite?

Divya Rao (24), Bollywood Blogger

Hardest part about being a woman – waking up every morning and deciding what to wear. Just kidding! Personally, the hardest part about being a woman has been to break out of this box society has put us in. We’re trapped by unrealistic perceptions and expectations of what we should behave like, look like, walk like, talk like, eat like, dress like, work like. Even our own bodies are not spared. Someone always has something to say about the “right” body type. the “right” hair length, the “right” skirt length… Our culture, some times, makes women pay a high price for being female.

Favourite part about being a woman – that I get to wake up every morning and play dress up. I’m serious! I love that I get to share an incredible relationship with my girlfriends, feel a range of emotions, and just be everything society doesn’t think I can be. :)

Dhanashree Koli (21), Graphic Designer

Dhanashree

I feel there would be no such thing as “being the hardest part of being a girl” if girls or women were not judged by their profession and their clothing. Besides life is too short to waste on outdated concepts that do not matter!

My favourite part is that when I do something, anything at all; I do it as a girl. There is no such thing as me doing something different as a man. I am just me, doing things and I am a girl! I am just me feeling and behaving like me and I’m a girl and this is my favourite part – being myself!

Hrishitaa Sharma (25), Fashion Blogger

Being an Army kid I’ve had a chance to travel a lot and be exposed to people from all walks of life. But wherever my dad was posted (metro city or remote area) one thing never changed – ‘The certain way a woman was supposed to be.” That is something that I’ve struggled with all my life.

My favourite part of being a woman is that I get to wear makeup, look my prettiest self and have guys fall for me even though I know they don’t have a chance! JKJK! ;)

Jyotika Udeshi (26), Guest Beauty Blogger

The hardest part, the worry. Whether it’s being afraid of staying out too late or walking on an empty road, I’m constantly stressed about my surroundings.

My favourite part of being a woman is the innate strength we possess. Women who are focused on their careers are brave enough to break stereotypes. Women who choose to give their all to themselves and their homes stay resilient against the taunts of society. As for the ladies who balance both, it’s their strength that keeps things from falling apart. It’s this special power that allows us to achieve whatever we set our minds on!

Mahak Jain (29), Guest Fashion & Bollywood Blogger – Team Dubai

mahak
mahak

I think the hardest part about being a girl for me has been growing up surrounded by the mindset that “every girl will one day leave home to become part of another family.” While I was fortunate enough to make my own decisions, I did in fact end up leaving home, moving across the world, and setting up a whole new life away from everything and everyone that I had ever known. Don’t get me wrong, I did it for love and would do it all over again if I had to, BUT I do hope that as society we slowly become more encouraging and accepting of the idea that a man can also uproot for a woman – it shouldn’t be taken for granted that marriage inherently entails a woman starting fresh for a man.

My favorite part about being a girl? Hands down the reaction you get from people when you accomplish something they didn’t expect of you. The look on people’s face is priceless when you, as a woman, kill it at something that is traditionally a “boy’s role.” Best. Feeling. Ever.

Malini Agarwal (39), Founder & Blogger-in-chief

For me the hardest part of being a woman was always feeling uncomfortable walking in anywhere alone. Where I’d have to wait to spot a friend and breathe a sigh of relief. That and finding my way home late at night in a taxi (because I have zero sense of direction) and stressing out completely till I got to a lane I recognised. I tried to think about why that is and I guess its because walking in anywhere alone I felt more stared at, judged, maybe even like a potential target for unwanted & mostly uncomfortable attention? The late night taxi ride, till I got my own car, would most likely happen after much dancing and many drinks. So that was a whole other beast, riddled with everything from moral judgement – aka the walk of shame I have so often repeated in front of my building watchman at 4:00am – to a genuine safety issue considering the horror stories we have all heard by now. God forbid I fell asleep in the taxi by mistake! But I don’t see anyone casting a disapproving eye on any guys who did that. In fact they’d probably applaud him for not drinking and driving.

What I absolutely love about being a woman is that we are master multitaskers. I also get to wear pretty clothes, try new makeup, get emo at movies AND I be the #bosslady of my own little empire with so many future boss ladies in the making! #tothemoon And can I hear it for girlie BFFs?! #FamilyForLife

Honestly, we live in a generation where women can and should be able to do anything and everything they want to with their lives. Just stop staring at us so much, you can follow me on Instagram instead!

Mallika Kulkarni (29), Sales & Marketing Manager

Mallika

The hardest part of being a woman/girl has been to prove that I know what’s best for myself – in all aspects of my life. Too often as women we are made to doubt our own wisdom, drown our inner voice, called out for being too emotional and not logical enough. Forced to listen to others/ elders “who are level headed, “who know better” and “have your best interests at heart”.

Ultimately it’s my life – whether it’s right or wrong, these are my choices, my victories and my mistakes to make and that’s the way it should be.

My favourite part – playing dress up! (though it’s been detrimental to my bank balance haha) I love that as girls/ women, we get to wear so many different styles of clothing and play around with makeup and can use fashion & beauty as an expression & extension of our personality. Especially Indian women – I love that we can own mini dresses AND the most gorgeous saris and can carry off both equally with aplomb!

Meghna Mirgnani (32), Executive Producer

Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. For if I fail, they won’t say she doesn’t have what it takes. They will say women don’t have what it takes.

Favourite part, giving yourself an orgasm and realizing, hey, I’m not with some lame guy that I have to pay attention to. I can do this shit as many times in a row as I want!

Meg D’Souza (27), Fashion & Music Blogger

One thing I (still) find really hard to deal with is random stares from men and sometimes even women. I don’t know if that’s because I’m a woman or because I have slightly different features or if it’s just a Delhi thing (cos plenty of my guy friends here also complain about this!). I like to dress up, wear make-up and wear dresses with high heels – but it’s never really too out there IMO. As I mentioned, I’m from Delhi so it’s only in my interest to dress modestly which is something I’m plenty careful about – again an idea that I don’t particularly agree with. But when you have people running the country saying repressive things about women in a male dominated country/society, it’s really a personal decision to make sure you’re safe on the streets. But people still stare. Which is a BT to deal with.
That and mood swings and cramps during that ‘time of the month’ are things I do not enjoy.

Best part of being a girl, the dressing up, fashion and make-up is definitely my favourite part. Not that it’s even a girl-thing anymore but it’s a part of life that I really enjoy and wish had more time (and patience) with :) also its always great to be on the receiving end of some simple chivalrous acts!

Meriam Ahari (32), Director of Fashion & Beauty

The hardest part of being a woman is not being able to pee whenever I want, wherever I want.

My favorite part of being a woman has always been having so many options when it comes to dressing up. I always feel so sad for men when we attend events and weddings and the attention is all on what dresses the girls are wearing since men are mostly stuck with black suits. Especially in the heat when they’re forced to wear a suit and we can get away with strapless, short dresses. Also, being able to cover up dark circles and blemishes with concealer. I don’t know how they live without the stuff!

Natasha Kishore (25), Personal Assistant & Photographer

Gratefully I was born in a family where I didn’t face any gender bias or difficulties while growing up. But when it came to choosing a profession filled majorly with men, I did face some challenges especially from my relatives who have been supportive all the time and their reactions definitely put me off for a bit and just made me realise we girls still have a long way to go to prove ourselves that we are not less than men or there is no such profession restricted only to men. Luckily for me my parents supported me and have been with me on this journey since then.

The best part for me will be following my passion and turning it into my full time profession, not many women photographers get support of their family I’m lucky my parents and my sister believe in me. For me that has been the best part that I can inspire many friends to follow what they love and that I can be a role model for my baby sister who I love the most!

Natasha Patel (25), Beauty Blogger

I feel that the hardest part about being a woman is the judgment that men pass while a we parallel park. I mean, I can literally feel the “OMG must be a woman driver” glares all around! Well F U, it’s hard for some people man!

The most special part of being a woman is the oodles of love my father showers on me and my little sisters. To feel loved and encouraged in every field of my life has been the best and most self assuring part!

Neha Dhawan Jambotkar (28), Client Servicing Manager

Neha

I was wearing a dress and took an uber to lunch and headed back in a rick this weekend. When I was in the rick – a man in his mid fifties – peered into my slow moving auto and touched his crotch. This is not the first time this has happened especially for somebody who has travelled by train but it happened to me after so long that I kind of forgot how ugly men’s thinking can be. So the worst part of being a woman – is dealing with the filthy minds of certain men who think dressing a certain way or wearing a certain colour of lipstick allows them to to invade my personal sacred space. And also, being conditioned to keep quiet about it.

My favourite part of being a woman is being able to express myself unabashedly. I have grown up in a patriarchal house & society at large – where men don’t communicate so well – so I love that I’m not judged as much for having a high EQ. Which sadly men are sometimes judged for. The whole “men don’t cry” thing. Pretty sad. On a lighter note – I also love that studies show women are biologically built to sleep longer than men! Haha so being a woman is AMAZING!

Nelly Wadia (28), Senior Stylist

Nelly

I think for me the hardest part was that people in general had this typical perception of what an ideal woman should be like and for some reason I was pretty much the opposite! I don’t think I’ll ever forget this day, when I was on my way to church, with 2 of my girlfriends and I had on a skirt, very demure I might add with a long sleeves top, I was about 12/13 at this time, 2 women from the neighbouring building passing by (might I add they were mothers) looked at me giggled and said, and I quote, “Arrey, Yeh toh prostitute lagti hai”. That day was the worst, I cried all the way to church and through mass, when I went home I said to myself, I wouldn’t tell my parents or let them know I had cried my eyes out. But as fate would have it, my parents were in the foyer of my building and when I saw my dad I couldn’t hold back my tears. They were so beyond pissed when I told them what had happened, they marched on over to their houses and fired the living day lights out of those two horrible women.

However, that being said I didn’t change much about myself, I remained untainted and honest to what I truly felt on the inside and decided to be as honest as possible about my opinions. When I made peace with that I remained unaffected by other peoples judgement and did what I pleased. Even if that meant being called a slut or a hooker.

I think my favourite part has definitely been breaking the stereotype, I’ve become everything that people said I was incapable of achieving. I’m happy to say I’m independent, opinionated and wearing what I please :)

Nicole Juneja (30), Brand Strategist – Team Delhi

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Rashtrapati Bhavan selfie ☀️

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Hardest part, being underestimated. Favourite part, being underestimated!

Pooja Dutta (33), Marketing & Sales Manager

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Time pass!!

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The hardest part of being a woman was the constant need of keeping everyone happy. As a child I was always told what a girl should and should not do. How a girl is always and solely responsible to respect everyone else’s choice and is disrespected and humiliated for anything she does for herself. The one thing that has cost me the most emotionally, physically, psychologically is the lack of respect and gender inequality in every area of my life.

The best part of being a woman is that I can be sensitive and strong at the same time. And also not to forget – more diverse choice of clothing!

Priyam Saha (25), Bollywood Blogger

The hardest about being a woman for me is dealing with patriarchy. I’m blessed enough to have come from a liberal, privileged background and I think I’m surrounded by people who share my approach towards life and in no way hold my gender against me. However, the world is full of naysayers and every now and then you find yourself second guessing yourself because someone made you feel that you’re not fair enough, tall enough, thin enough, pretty enough, serious enough, man enough, woman enough… Good enough.

My favourite thing about being a woman? All of it! My ability to express, communicate, create, think, multitask, dress up, wear red lipstick, drink wine, dance like no one’s watching, make friendships with other women, be strong, laugh, cry, fuck, love, live – all of it!

Rashmi Daryanani (25), Bollywood Blogger

The hardest part of being a woman for me is dealing with arbitrary rules/restrictions that don’t seem to apply equally to men – things I can’t do, stuff I shouldn’t say, places I can’t go “because I’m a woman“. It’s ridiculous, limiting, and can be a real drag to overcome. When your goals/dreams are equal to that of a man, being “held back” in your means to get there makes it needlessly difficult.

My favourite thing about being a woman is getting to be a part of a large, loving sisterhood. I am the person I am because of the strong female influences in my life, both my family and friends. My daily life is spent surrounded by some of the most intelligent, inspiring, hardworking, giving women, and this positive female energy is something I’m grateful for every single day.

Resham Sahni (23), Social Media Manager

Being reared in a small town of Odisha, I had to face the constant fear of being judged about the clothes I wear or the way I walk, the places I go or the male counterparts I interact with. When I moved to Mumbai 5 years ago, I realized that I no longer have to live with restrictions. And trust me when I say this, a woman is truly unstoppable the day she realizes she deserves better. To all the brave and beautiful ladies out there, know that you’re much more powerful. Happy Woman‘s Day! :)

Samira Major (30), Creative Head, Video

sam

What has been the hardest part of being a woman/girl in my life? Honestly – nothing. I was quite outspoken and rebellious throughout my formative years against conservative parents (whom I love dearly and don’t blame in the slightest btw) so I never had to face any kind of inequality growing up. And as an adult, I think that mindset helped me pretty much force my way into equal opportunities everywhere. So yay. :)

BUT 2 things I could do without:
1) The staring and “accidentally” brushing past my body, courtesy a few filthy men on the streets. Touch me again and die.
2) CRAMPS. The goddamn cramps.

And what has been my favourite? Honestly? I think in one important way, we have more freedom than men – to express ourselves. Be it emotionally, sexually, our clothing and lifestyle choices. There’s a lot a man has to keep under control, all the time. There’s a lot for us too – but I think we get away with more, with less ridicule.

Sukriti Gumber (24), Bollywood Blogger – Team Delhi

The worst part, I feel, is the body shaming. Why is my bra lying around considered shameful? Why are my breasts sexual? I hate the fact that women have to be conscious about certain (normal) stuff which men take for granted.

The best part about being a woman is having female friends who give me a perspective on life. I love having positive women around me, and no matter how good your male friends are, it’s extremely important to surround yourself with female energy. I cherish my girl friends the most in my life.

Swagata Dam (25), Bollywood Blogger

For some reason, my periods have always been extremely painful. As a teenager, I could not help but wish I was a boy during ‘that time of the month’ as they put it. As soon as I finally got used to it, I developed some hormonal issues that made the cramps further unbearable. I wish I had the super power to not feel a thing for those five days every month. If only. Also, convincing my parents to let me go on solo trips has been quite a task solely because of my gender. Thankfully, I triumphed in getting their permission last year and didn’t get the usual, ‘Get married and go wherever you want with your husband’ from them.
Well, there are so many things I love about being a woman that I don’t wish I was a boy EVER, not even during ‘those days’. I love that I am all heart. I love my lipsticks and floral dresses. I love the bond that I share with other incredible women like my mother and with my girlfriends. As Carrie from Sex And The City says:

Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with.

Viraj Soni (23), Makeup Artist

The hardest part of being a woman in our country is to be expected to live stereotypical life, of growing up and getting married. Who set this rule? Or a certain time of must marry age limit. I believe being independent is all that matters! And we shall follow our passions with pride and achieve our goals.

The best part of being a woman is how we are able to groom ourselves. Wanting to look pretty comes to us at an early age, which helped me discover my immense passion for makeup at age 12 and now at 23 that I’ve made a career out of my love for makeup! “Do what you love, love what you do! ”

Yeansha Lodha (21), Assistant Stylist

As a girl, I’m always afraid people are going to blame my gender for my mistakes. Do badly on a math test? Girls can’t do math. Misunderstand something? Women can’t handle responsibility. Having a bad day? You must have PMS. Reject a guy? You led him on. Why would you talk to him if you weren’t interested? It’s annoying and I hate it and sometimes I just wish I could be a guy.
The worst is when you’re in a bad mood because something legit happened, and a guy makes a sarcastic remark about you having your period. Female stereotypes are so annoying and unfair.

Favourite. We can wear guys clothes. If they wear ours, they get funny looks.

Zina Tasreen (32), Guest Fashion Blogger

Hardest part: The incessant pressure from anyone and everyone to enter into wedlock once you reach a certain age and then to procreate.

Favourite part: SO many wardrobe options — dresses, skirt, jeans, salwar suits, lehenga, sarees, pantsuits — whereas the menfolk are stuck with just one or two.

So there you have it, the girls of MissMalini’s World have spoken! Aren’t they all kinds of awesome?! I hope you liked this blog and will share your answers too, remember to leave your Instagram handle in the comments as well so I can follow you if you do :)

And finally here’s a picture of MY mom (when she was half my age) because she will always be the #1 Woman in the world for me. Happy Women’s Day mamma! I love you <3

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Happy birthday to my gorgeous mother. I can't begin to thank you for everything you have done for me mom (and 3 other crazy siblings!) We would definitely not be the people we are without your love and support. I often take for granted that you let me pursue just about any dream I wanted. From professional dancing to standing for hours with me in line at All India Radio for a shot at an audition. When I told you at 22 that I wanted to pick up my bags and move to Bombay, you were apprehensive but let me go. I sit here today thinking back to all the times you sat front row at my shows with a handycam and cut out or Facebook shared every press clipping. You always say you're my biggest fan. I hope you know I am yours too. (Even if I don't do as good a stalker job as you do – hahaha just kidding!) Love you so much mamma! Happy birthday and thank you for firing up the engines that will take me #tothemoon! 🚀😍❤️

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