14 Sex Scenes That Are Nearly Impossible To Do In Real Life

Shreemi Verma , 26 Jul 2017
Akshay Kumar, Rekha, Mallika Sherawat and a Snake
Akshay Kumar, Rekha, Mallika Sherawat and a Snake

Sex in movies is often different from the sex people have in real life. Firstly, due to censorship, most movies have women and men wearing some clothes while making love, which is often not the case when you’re actually doing the deed.

That’s still okay though, the problem arises when sometimes films take things to the next level. Many of which are difficult to replicate in real life, doesn’t matter how adventurous you are.

Here’s a list of the strangest ones –

1) Rang Rasiya – Paint it red

Nandana Sen poses semi-naked for Randeep Hooda while he paints her portrait, then he starts painting on her. They go at it soon enough, doing it on top of spilled paint. It’s nearly impossible to do that IRL guys, paint isn’t lube.

2) Ajnabee – Copying Ghost, but making it desi

Kareena Kapoor and Bobby Deol had an intimate scene in Abbas-Mustan‘s cult classic Ajnabee. Only like most of the film, this one is a copy of Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze‘s iconic pottery scene in Ghost.

Anyway, here Kareena and Bobby are feeling the heat with aata (flour) in their hands. Imagine having sex with roti making dough in your hands! It’ll be really problematic.

3) Murder – Is this a sex scene or an episode of fear factor?

Murder has some really interesting sex scenes, but the ones in the Bheege Hont Tere takes it to the next level (on the terrace of the building to be precise). The terrace is still cool, but the two do are doing it on the concrete roof of a flat. There are 2 problems here, first – they’re doing it on concrete, the second – if either of them rolls over, they could fall down and die. Awkward.

4) Hate Story – Breaking back on the stairs

Okay what’s up with Bollywood trying to do it at places which won’t be good for their backs? Paoli Dam and Joy Sengupta are so turned on that they have sex on the stairs of his house. Not impossible, but definitely difficult.

5) Crank – Boinking on the streets

Jason Statham’s character needs to keep his adrenaline pumping through constant excitement and danger in order to survive, so he goes ahead and has sex with his girlfriend on the streets. Or at a racecourse. 

In the real world, doing it doggy style (or in any position) in public guarantees imprisonment. So like, don’t do it.

6) Shoot ‘Em Up – Ride or die

Clive Owen and Monica Belluci‘s sexy time is interrupted by a shootout. But the ride or die couple (in every sense) refuse to stop the sex. Clive shoots and kills the men around him with Monica’s legs firmly wrapped around his torso. Not gonna happen.

7) Nowhere – Sex in a club

Ryan Phillippe and Heather Graham play a couple, in this teenage drama who are obsessed with sex. They do it anywhere and everywhere. Even in a convertible at a public place or at a well-lit nightclub, with Ryan pulling his pants down and showing his butt. All of this will be a little difficult to do at a club in India.

8) Damage – A politician has sex with his son’s fiancée, in the corner of a road and doesn’t get caught

Umm…politicians get caught watching porn in public, imagine what’ll happen when they have sex in public.

9) Howard The Duck – Bestiality at it’s best

I can’t explain.

10) Hiss – Mallika Sherawat really wants that snake to ‘Slytherin’

If this happens in real life, it’ll be really weird. Like really, really weird.

11) True Romance – Phone sex

The transparent walls of a phone booth are a giveaway that you’re boning. The others waiting in a line will probably notice what you’re up to.

12) Spring Breakers – The water is wet and so is everyone

Threesomes aren’t that easy in general. Having sex in a pool is not trouble free either. A threesome in a swimming pool is just a disaster waiting to happen.

13) Splice – Incest but with an alien

A scientist couple create an animal-human hybrid. The mother (without telling her husband) puts her own human DNA while making her, basically, the alien is like her daughter. As she grows, the husband and the creature start getting attracted to each other and develop a sexual relationship. Unrealistic is having sex with an alien, creepy is having sex with a creature you developed like your daughter.

14) Khiladion Ka Khiladi – In the swamp, no control

Akshay Kumar and Rekha‘s erotic song – In the night no control has them doing various sexy things with each other, one of them is dancing around covered in muck. Why will normal people have sex while drenched in dirt? Why?

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