Ever met him? Well, not for long. A ghoster is someone who suddenly stops all communication with you while dating, without any prior signs or notice. Every single woman encounters this man at least once. Some, unfortunately, more than that.
Here’s how you recognise and stop a ghoster.
1. He zones out of meaningful conversations (you think you’re having)
You think he’s listening to you, because he’s good at pretending. And you misunderstand it for interest in that deep talk you think you’re having. The reason he’s not listening to you is because he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about your family and how many brothers you grew up with or what your hobbies are and what you like doing when you have free time. The best way to test this is by asking him something about the things you’ve already told him. You’ll know he zoned out if he stutters out a reply.
2. He takes forever to reply to your texts
He’s one of those guys who text when they please, but take so long to reply to yours. He wants to take his own time and reply when he wants to. Most times, he answers in monosyllables. Sound familiar?
3. He likes to be in control
He always calls the shots. You want to meet him? Doesn’t matter. He’ll only meet you when he feels like. If he doesn’t want to, he’ll give you the strangest excuses to get out of it. Ever heard of “I can’t seem to get out of bed today. Today’s plan seems bleak”. Or, “Can’t meet today, it’s too hot outside.”
4. He brings up his views on casual relationships all the time
This is literally to clarify that he’s not looking for a serious relationship. How he doesn’t see himself getting married for a long time and also justifies how ‘marriage’ is a concept he doesn’t believe in. This gives him a good window to jump out when he’s done with you.
5. He’s secretive
He doesn’t reveal much about himself. He only tells you the superficial information he tells every other girl so he doesn’t have to remember a lot of his lies. You won’t know much about his family and will be quite vague about his work too.
6. He comes across as an opportunist
This is because he is. He prefers to meet you over a drink as opposed to a coffee. Because he knows he doesn’t want to strike a long conversation with you. Instead, he prefers quick action. He texts you only when he’s lonely. Not when he misses you. He doesn’t. Ever.
7. He avoids meeting your friends or family
He wants to keep this so-called ‘relationship’ low-key. He doesn’t want many people to know about it, since he’s going to pull off a smooth exit very soon. Meeting family or friends, in his head, is too serious for him.
It’s important to spot this guy way before you give in. Know him fast, know him well. You don’t want to be in bed, with a bucket of ice-cream, watching a cheesy rom-com and crying about how he suddenly stopped being around. You’re better, no wait, smarter than that. Mr. Ghoster, we’re on to you!