8 Women Answer The Question—Is Choosing To Be A Housewife Wrong In This Era?

Suruchi Patwary , 05 Apr 2019

Being a housewife is a tough job! In today’s world, there are a lot of people who acknowledge and understand this fact. But then, there are some others who simply think being a housewife doesn’t include any ‘real’ work. And this isn’t even the saddest part! The latter group actually includes both men and women from all walks of life.

And recently, one of our Malini’s Girl Tribe members, Nishta Satpute, asked the others in the tribe how they feel about women consciously choosing to be housewives, even in today’s era. And TBH, it was such a healthy, comforting and positive conversation that reminded us how small steps can make big changes, even if that means to help each other grow mentally by having such conversations regularly. And, the women who responded to this question really put things into perspective beautifully and here are some of their responses.

1. Lakshmi Areekath on freedom of choice

There is no one recipe for happiness. As long as one gets to choose one’s path I cannot see how a housewife is any lesser than a working woman or vice versa.

2. Vivyan Sarlas on accepting the truth, unabashedly

It’s easier to focus on women’s’ personal decisions and give them sh*t for it than it is to challenge power structures, even though it’s just woke sexism.

Personally, I, being wildly unsuited to the labour force, can see myself in a marriage not involving a lot of heavy financial responsibility on my part.

3. Swati Tiwari on not caring about others’ opinion

People look down upon housewives and people look down upon working women. So do your thing girl, and don’t focus on people

4. Rashmi Deb on the realities of both jobs

My God, it is not easy being a housewife. Looking after everybody and taking responsibility for them 24/7 is not a cakewalk. The only thing I believe is that we need to be able to make our choices. Thus if being a housewife is what we choose to be, we shouldn’t be anymore judged than if we choose to have a full fledged career. 

5. Milan Vohra on societal conditioning

It’s all conditioning. We’re conditioned to believe our worth is greater only if we’re ‘doing’ something and being a great homemaker is not considered ‘doing’ anything. I remember reading the memoir written by Barbara Cartland when I was a teenager and I remembered being struck by her observation that her life was simpler because role expectations were so clear cut. Of course, that is hugely debatable but as long as a person (guy or girl) know what makes them happy and aren’t being devalued for being the boss at home, it’s great! Unfortunately, many women would also judge a man who chooses to be a stay at home spouse. There are too few good examples of it even today!

6.Taraa Vermaa Senguptaa on how it should be in an ideal world

Being a homemaker is a choice unless the woman is forced to be one. Just as being a working woman is a choice unless the woman is forced to be one. In an ideal world, neither should be judged.

7. Deeksha Prakash on being prepared for the worst to happen

If for some reason you end up unhappy in your marriage and want to end it, if you completely give up your own career, you will be in a tough spot. Not impossible to overcome by any means, but something to consider.

8. Prerna Sinha on giving the husband the same choice too

It’s not the housewife’s fault that they are not getting paid for the work they do. It doesn’t make their job any less important. ‘Ideally’, it should be a couple’s decision, if they both want to earn & run the house together or one wants to earn and one wants to run the house. Either way, it’s 50/50. And men should be given a choice too, why do they always have to be the main bread earner of the family.
Being in my early twenties, I haven’t really thought about how I’d want to contribute to my family once I am married. But I know for sure whatever I decide, it should make me happy and not make me regret my decision. This discussion really made me feel okay for having my own opinion, especially when the topic circles around such an important decision of our lives.
What are your thoughts on women choosing to be housewives in today’s world and age? Come join the conversation at Malini’s Girl Tribe on Facebook and tell us how you feel about this! We’re having many more such interesting, fun and healthy conversation there.

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