It is rightly said that marriage is an institution. In this cultural universal, there is a lot to share, learn and earn between two individuals who are committed for life. Building a harmonious relationship physically, emotionally and financially with the better half is important for a healthy marriage. Relationship-building activities are pursued not only between the two married individuals but also with their respective families and friends. A good marriage can make a huge impact on the holistic growth and development of the two involved and also on others in connection to them. At the same time, tensions in a marriage can drastically get one rolling downhill.
In this day and age, marriages have turned out to be trickier owing to so many external forces. Forces that lead to immense stress, pressures, time constraints and unrealistic expectations from self and others. A culture of dating with no strings attached is growing stronger than ever. Marriages are bearing the brunt. Thus, mental and physical illnesses are on the rise.
Malini’s Girl Tribe on Facebook gives solace to many aching souls. Almost every second day, we have posts on marital issues which are truly heartbreaking. The amazing community hears one out, gives amazing advice, extends support and real help. This gets us thinking of what does it takes to live a happy married life. We believe in love stories and fairy tales. One should never stop trusting the power of magical love. Right? How does the happily-ever-after come true? What does it take to remain blissfully married?
We spoke to an ace marriage counselor and drew a list of some basic parameters to work on to strengthen marital bonds. If you are going through a rough phase in your marriage, give it a read while pondering upon how to have the weaker parameter sorted!
It is true that the biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. A lot is lost in a marriage when things are strongly felt but not spoken about. It is imperative that you build a relationship where you can openly talk about pressing concerns, discuss solutions, express complex emotions and have the liberty to talk about anything and everything under the sun. Sometimes, you must choose the diplomatic way. If opening to your partner is difficult and the reaction is worrisome, you may have to plan it out in advance. Choose the right time, right place and the right way to talk it out—keeping each other’s mood in check.
Communication and transparency go hand in hand. If communication is robust and feelings are transparent, it is easier to build the most important foundation of a marriage, which is trust. To be trusted is greater than to be loved. A strong marriage has no room for integrity issues which comes with not having to hide feelings or lie to your partner about anything at all. If you are at the receiving end of lies, it is important to introspect and understand as to why it is difficult for your loved one to tell you the truth. Managing your reactions in a way that you are approachable is equally crucial.
A true friend is the one we confide in without worrying about being judged. Hanging out with your best friend is fun. When you are with your best buddy, time flies. Life is a lot easier with a true friend to share the journey with! Marrying your best friend or befriending your partner is the best gift you could give yourself. Building your friendly bond and blending with your partner’s likes and dislikes takes the relationship to another level. This makes it easier with respect to other parameters too.
Human beings are not meant to be perfect. The definition of perfect is very individualistic too. When one size doesn’t fit all, mistakes are bound to happen in so many aspects of your marital life. Many a times, you may not approve of your partner’s habits and certain actions. It is important to communicate about the same. Instead of holding grudges, forgive your partner. Being empathetic and moving on for the sake of better times is the key.
Marriage is a whole lot of teamwork. From i-me-myself to ‘we’ and ‘ours’ strengthens the bond to great heights. Life turns into a joint project. It is never a struggle alone. To have someone who always has your back is a blessing indeed. The excitement doubles up when a couple is supremely united to execute major life plans, whether it is running a house or building a mansion together.
Hope you can identify the parameter you wish to strengthen to have a blissful married life ahead!