Bollywood Movie Review: Jai Ho

January 24, 2014
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Jai Ho

Jai Ho

Sometimes I feel like letting people know your thoughts of a Salman Khan film – especially one like Jai Ho - is a pointless exercise (almost as pointless as the film itself), because everyone has already decided what they want out of it. They’re either going in with the intention of watching Bhai in all his glory, or they’re planning to enjoy it for all the WTFery. But either way, it gets watched.

Fortunately, for the first group, there’s enough in there to make Jai Ho a film that will be worth all your money – there’s Bhai beating up goons, Bhai taking off his shirt, Bhai dancing in his trademark manner. Unfortunately, for the second group, while there are moments of unintentional hilarity (like, Bhai beating up goons, Bhai taking off his shirt, Bhai dancing in his trademark manner), it also comes with the side-effect of a headache. For those people, I hope your cinema is offering a Crocin in the price of the ticket.

Normally, I’d start off my review by summarising the story, but there isn’t any real one in this film. Jai Ho has nothing new to offer, really – it has taken a) Salmania, b) your typical Bollywood masala elements, and c) the concept of Pay It Forward, and mixed it all together to create this – for lack of a better word – story. So you’ve got what is essentially a sequence of scenes which serve as an ode to Salman Khan, where he singlehandedly beats up goons, challenges authority, protects women, saves children, and – to top it all off – gets everyone to do something nice for one another.

While the entire concept should be inspiring (at its very core, it’s not all that different from Nayak), the film ends up looking contrived more than anything else. How can the political drama and common man empowerment have any real impact when you just can’t take the film seriously? I mean, Salman kicks an ambulance in order to get it to start, and Suniel Shetty shows up with a legitimate army tanker to save our hero!

Jai Ho

Jai Ho

What makes it worse is that this looks less like a film made with genuine intentions and more like a “friends and family” portrait, to give anyone who knows Salman an opportunity to start (or, in some cases, restart) their career. So, you have names like Ashmit Patel, Pulkit Samrat, Sana Khan and Aditya Pancholi associated with the project. There’s also newbie Daisy Shah, and while she is undoubtedly earnest and dances well, she doesn’t have much to do because this is Salman’s show all the way.

You know what, though? At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter even a little bit that the story is inane, the music is bad, and the film looks like a B-grade one. Because Salman Khan does what he does best, and his fans are still going to go all out and enjoy it. The film could have practically been named Being Salman Khan. Or they should have stuck with the earlier title, Mental - that, at least, better described my state of mind while exiting the theatre.

Verdict:

Does it matter? You’ll end up watching it anyway.

Leave A Comment
  • simmi

    no no no, not watching it….also didnt watch dhoom 3….

  • Tina Khan

    i expected this from you/ u are a salman hater. public is loving it. from toady i am not going to read any of your posts,

  • Amber Shafi

    very rude and ironic piece of crap(review) towards the movie..do u think the thousands of people who rushed to cinema to watch Salman Khan’s movies are fool? either u give one star or no star to jai ho it has no worth..stars does not matter he is beyond this b******t ..he will rock it again InshaaaAllah..haters gonna hate we dont care.get a life!!

    • Miss M

      Ppl like you are the reason why this country is in the dumps.

      • Amber Shafi

        well miss malini i give respect to positive and constructive critisim but your post is all about to let down the salman khan movie and u r just making fun of it..every thing have flaws but when it comes to analysis ,one should discuss the negativities and positivites both..i think u r following my point.

        • Amber Shafi

          for me, jai ho is an art of giving..its heart felt..one can watch it again and again to boost urself up,to serve humanity..its just fantastic..salman khan is succeeded to win the heart of everyone and by the way i m his international fan..he is just phenomenal and his agenda in this movie is straight out from the heart..Jai Ho

      • Manish Bhardwaj

        how much do you get paid from SRKs camp to post false information?

    • Tahasin Sadaf

      really MissM, are these the people putting India in dumps?
      Sp tell me miss what have YOU done? The answer is in Jai ho..

      Go watch it !!

  • Riya

    Are you Joking? I saw the movie just and it is tooo good to write in words. Not salman fan but Love this movie and mesg.

  • Deepti Sharma

    hahaha thought miss malini gives accurate info.Don’t think u have seen this movie even.

  • Kajal

    seriously !.. learn to b neutral nd open minded before doing journalism.. clearly shows ur hatred in this senseless piece of article u have penned down..used to love coming here but not anymore.. bye BiasedMalini

  • Devinder Mann

    This movie is something which everyone will like not just Salman fans. And if you don’t like it , means you are one fix mind of hater. Jai Ho and thanks Salman for beautiful mesg because my parents don’t see holllywood movies so getting mesg through hindi movie and like this was very good job. Movie for Aaam Junta . Jeeyo

  • mayur Bhopnikar

    Well said..No Script,No well developed Character..Need a crocin to watch..and salman fans Take criticism sportingly..Bad and good movies happens

  • Sandy

    You actually seems to be joking with this kind of review. This movie is far better than boring n lame jokes of Chennai Express , from over the flow stunts of Dhoom 3(I like Aamir tho) , better from these movies which made figures. Jai Ho is a lot better than his others. Real Salman and very nice mesg which can change nation. I am doing chain of helping 3 ppl now.Jai ho

  • https://www.facebook.com/vsumit Sumit Vaswani

    Love the honest review!

  • https://www.facebook.com/danielmehta1 Daniel Mehta

    No brainer…entertainer… Bhai is Bhai..baaki sabh paani kum chai…

  • Meh

    I am so glad to see a sensible review! Its all crap…Chennai Express, Dhoom3 and all the Salmania. Shame on ppl who are commenting here saying its a great film…it just is not! and we all know that! Its like staying saying the weather is hot in winter when everyone knows its not. Such blind fans are the reason for the degrading standards of Bollywood. Everyone who thinks I don’t know anything about film and I’m being a bitch for telling the truth…”Boo!” because I don’t give a damn!

    • Mounika Reddy

      Hey good, Miss Malini will definitely like your reply for sure. But she will be wondering whats wrong with Chennai Express. She is a sucker for Shah Rukh Khan.

  • juliadreyfuss

    There is no hope for India progressing with movies of such low standard churned out by the dozen. People should rather concentrate on studying and doing something constructive rather than waste time on this kind of junk. That said, I’ve not watched a hindi movie in the last 9 years and yes I am very happy about it.

    • deepti

      So that is why you follow Miss malini ? LOL

  • imshahrukh

    HAHAHA… Miss Malini… Fancy name does not give you fancy qualitative writing skills. Here you have proved the NEGATIVE media yet again as seen and expected by an indian journalist in the recent times. It is clearly because of journalists like you who like to sell something because its DIFFERENT and not TRUE that the good journalism never gets noticed. Simply because the nation is full of fake journalism or a business of selling stories of yet another stories like bollywood. Go shove it up your ass as you dont know jack shit about the movie. To me at times it didnt even make sense if you were talking about the movie or Salman because clearly you were focusing a lot on Salman Khan as if this review is on him and not the movie. LASTLY, a word to all those people regardless of them being a Salman fan or not. Please take this message seriously; its a great movie. You should all go watch it atleast once. I know u all did watch Chennai Express and Dhoom 3 and all such idiotic cinema in the past… Watch this.. its actually meaningful. Yeah its a bollywood movie and it sure has its own negatives that in my opinion every bollywood movie has.. but thats what makes Bollywood CInema different than the rest. And you Miss Malini- one recommendation as you seem to be a free speaker when it comes to reviewing people atleast become that free in reviewing people. Focus on reviewing movies rather than people. After reading this I would surely like to review your website and the radiculous content you have up here within which I will only talk about how big of a hater you are forgetting the fact that i am reviewing you website not you… SCREW YOU MALINI – SALINI – KHALINI – FAK-E-NI… get a life.

  • Mounika reddy

    Anyway its not Miss Malini who wrote this review. Some person named Rashmi. You hate Salman to the core, that is evident in this review. Yes this movie has no story. Chennai express has a shit load of story in it.OMG Chennai express is an awesome movie coz it has your favourite SRK and DP. Missmalini.com is run by a bunch of salman kahan and Katrina kaif haters. Don’t get offended by the comments, just think for a moment, that you might be actually be doing something wrong here(in missmalini office rather haters club).

  • https://www.facebook.com/nitant.mendiratta Nitant Mendiratta

    how can people criticise miss m . she wrote what she felt about the movie. and honestly whatever she wrote is true.

  • guggi

    Thats rude man!! Seems like a personal rant than a review.

  • Simran

    To whoever written this review from MM Team . Just want to tell you do that you need to work on your writing and reviews means ” Movie ” reviews not “Actor” (who don’t follow every shit ) review. If you can write THIS review for simple and nice movie which carry a good mesg at end, then honestly you should not be doing this job. Go and just edit pictures or add captions, that is your job.

    About Movie, I live in NZ and went for movie with quite a big group. Each and everyone in theater enjoyed the movie and ended it with Jai Ho . And every radio is already talking about helping people in real like in movie which i never heard they talking in last 8 years. Mesg is for world so respect it atleast.Thanks.

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